Monday, September 20, 2010

Gigi Waxing Kit: A Sticky Situation

WARNING: This story is a little graphic at times. Read at your own risk.

The summer I turned 16, I decided to try waxing my legs for the first time. I went to the grocery store, bought a wax kit, and gave it a whirl at home. I ended up only managing to get random blotches of my legs waxed, and got so much wax on the kitchen counter/floor/sink and my skin, it took over a week to get it all off (the kit didn't come with wax remover).

It's been 5 years since then, and when I saw this kit in the store, I thought, "Why not try again?" I reasoned that I'm older now, wiser even. I won't repeat the same mistakes as last time.


The kit contained everything needed to successfully wax body hair (including a big bottle of wax remover... I made sure I had some this time!), and was fairly inexpensive (roughly $20). It contained everything shown in the photo below: microwaveable wax, small and large muslin strips, wooden wax applicators, and a few lotions and potions to aid the process.


I took a shower to ensure my skin was clean, and then set up shop on my kitchen floor, laying out garbage bags just in case there was a wax spill. Because my roommate was out of town, I decided it would be easiest to go sans-clothing for this process. Normally I wouldn't consider this to be a crucial part of my story, but I think it emphasizes the hilarity of events to come. Additionally, I didn't bother to draw the blinds/curtains of my apartment, because I would be sitting on the floor, and apparently my thought process is "the neighbors can't see me if I'm on the floor".

I heated up the wax for 45 seconds, and it came out of the microwave nice and hot, stirrable, and ready to spread. Sitting on the garbage bag flooring I had created, I grabbed my first wooden applicator, dipped it in the wax, and spread it on my left shin in the direction of hair growth (as instructed by the box). I quickly grabbed a large muslin strip, rubbed it on top of the wax in direction of the hair growth, and waited about ten seconds before holding my breath and ripping off the strip from bottom to top (opposite direction of hair growth). Voila! First strip down. A little painful, but appeared to remove all hair in it's path. "Why have I waited so long to try this again?" I asked myself while preparing for the next patch of hair.

I notice that I've already gotten a little wax on my fingers. No biggie. I can certainly use the wax remover later, right?

By strip three, the wax had become less stirrable, but I didn't notice much, other than the fact that I was scooping up way too much wax with my applicator. By strip 8, I had managed to get wax drippings not only on my left leg, but on my right leg, stomach, and arms as well. By the time I got to strip 9, I had so much extra wax on my legs/hands/surrounding environment, I couldn't even move without having something stick to me.

I hope the photo below gives you an idea of how sticky this stuff is. See how the lid is ajar? Don't worry, it's wax-stuck that way. I couldn't screw it on/off if I tried. The wax on the sides? Not going anywhere.

At this point, I decide that it would be foolish to attempt to wax my second leg, considering I couldn't even pick up a single muslin strip with my sticky fingers. Instead, I decide to dabble in waxing my bikini line. I'm already naked, right? You always hear that it is excruciatingly painful, so the wise, waxing amateur that I am thought it would be great fun to try it out.

I decided to start with a minuscule patch, and as expected, the wax removed the hair painfully well. It was definitely not the most comfortable process, but I have a pretty high pain tolerance and could stand it enough to go back for a second strip. On the third strip, however, something went awry. Perhaps the wax didn't dry enough, or maybe I didn't rip the strip off fast enough (I don't see how that is possible, as I certainly wasn't trying to take my time with it), but I ended up not only with some random wax residue on my skin, but with broken blood vessels AKA a large bruise. And is that a drop of blood I see? Great. I now look like the victim of a Gigi Wax Kit assault.

A small muslin strip and wax applicator

At this point I realize it is time to toss in the towel, though I couldn't physically toss anything from my body if I tried. I reach up to the kitchen counter and stick the bottle of wax remover to my wrist, and proceed to squeeze a little out to start removing some wax.

Unfortunately, what Gigi considers wax remover, I consider crap. This stuff did nothing to take the wax off of my skin. I realize then that my best bet is to try using it along with some soap in the shower, so I stand up and realize, in broad daylight, that I am entirely naked in front of a group of college students walking past my ceiling high, wall-length windows on the way to the bus stop. Additionally, I am standing in what I would like to describe as "Star Position", with my arms and legs spread away from each other and the rest of my body, because by this time every limb is covered with enough wax to pick up a small child.

Maintaining Star Position, I begin to walk, and quickly realize I even have wax on the bottom of my feet. Imagine a naked Frankenstein rushing to get somewhere... that is what I looked like. After flashing the neighbors and bus stop on my journey to the bathroom, I climb into my shower and spend the next 90 minutes lathering up with soap, mixing in wax remover, then turning the shower on to wash what I can off. Several times I think I've gotten everything, move to get out of the shower, and have my legs stick together with wax I haven't found yet.

The result: one smooth, bruised leg (they formed there too), one very hairy leg, and a bikini line that deserves a cameo on Law and Order: SVU.

Summary of my thoughts: works, but is such a hassle that I will be using a good old fashioned razor and shaving cream from now on.

25 comments:

  1. OMG!! That is terrible I am literally laughing out loud right now! I won't be trying any at home waxing kits anytime soon haha

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  2. Oh my goodness...one tip for getting off wax is to use an oil. Some kits come with them, but you can even use olive oil or similar from your kitchen and it works equally as well. I too, have had similar escapades with waxing but you do get the hang of it after a while! I recommend the Sally Hansen white chocolate wax (something like that) if you ever decide to give it another try! It smells great and really does work!

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  3. hahaha omg! that sounded like a real adventure, i would hate to flash people out my window.
    well i've always wanted to try waxing. and surprisingly after reading this i still want to.... ya.

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  4. HA! i love everything about this story.
    except for your pain, obviously. hopefully you heal quickly!

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  5. omgosh!! what a story! you're a great writer! i totally felt as though i was there with you through the story!! are you planning to wax the other leg anytime soon? i hope you managed to get ALL the wax off!

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  6. This is hilarious!! So much more interesting than to pay attention in my communication and medium class.
    Just made my day a bit happier!

    And when I'm at a clinic getting waxed they use oil to remove the rest of the wax. Works pretty good. Good luck!

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  7. thanks for this warning. i'm so clumsy that such a method could never work for me. it also sounds really painful and scary (bruises, omg)

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  8. Oh my gosh! This is hilarious! I'm so glad you have a good sense of humor about all of it! Waxing of the bikini area is a turn off the phone, lock the doors, pull the blinds, pour a glass of wine, and just go for it kind of ordeal.
    Although I seriously loved how you wrote this; I feel as if I was right there. Hope those bruises heal soon!

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  9. Oh my goodness, that is one crazy experience. :p

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  10. hahahah:) been there, dont that. Best wax remover in the world = olive oil! Works like a charm.

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  11. We've all had horrible and embarrassing moments, but it's good to be able to look back and laugh at them. Thank you for testing out this product and posting your experience so I don't have to go through something similar. I so enjoyed your story and thanks for sharing it with us. It definitely made me chuckle and think of my own experiences I've had that were similar.

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  12. try an epilator....i will never go back to shaving. and its mess free!

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  13. Try Poetic Waxing by Bliss (sold at Sephora) I'm obsessed and never going back to another method of waxing!!!

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  14. That story was so funny, I had the perfect mental picture of you in my mind while reading it. This is my first time popping by your blog and I will definitely be a new follower - hilarious, and well written!

    xo Michelle

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  15. Yeah I hate the messiness. The best is to do it at a salon, but I usually only do it for bikini wax.

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  16. If you want to wax your legs, use a roll-on wax that is water soluble, they're pretty hard to find but amazon has it. For bikini areas try a no-strip wax, Sally Beauty Supplies sells them, its quick, easy, efficient and not messy. Unless your a pro with waxing, wax in a jar is tricky, and as Amarixe describe a pretty hairy experience.

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  17. I'm sorry to say that this made me crack up, it must have been a very bad and embarrassing experience! Thanks for the advice though, I definitely know I won't be trying at-home-waxing anytime soon :)

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  18. Years ago, after watching one of those commercials for NADS, I decided to give waxing a shot. Stupidly I started with my bikini line, and instead of removing hair I ripped off my skin and had little blood spots everywhere. OUCH.

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  19. i am covered in wax as i type this! I too am a victim of Gigi wax assault! Not to mention the wax kit exploded in my microwave and I cant get it out! The containter says use petroleum jelly to get wax off. We'll see. i tried oil base things like baby oil and eye makeup remover and none of it worked. So i used a dish sponge boiling hot water and dish soap! after scrubbing my skin raw i got it off my fingers and nails. Now for microwave :(

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  20. hahaha im sorry but the 2nd last paragraph with the result made me laugh so hard haha. Im sorry for your bad experience with gigi wax. I am an esthetics student and we use the gigi line at the school i study at and i love the stuff. I had never done wazing before this program and by the end of year one i had been sleeping through my leg waxes and the 2nd time i did my bikini it didnt hurt. And my pain tolerance is like -50. So that is saying alot! To help from shying away from wax because the product can become messy, i can recommend that you use a roll on applicator with the wax in the bottom of it. its less messy, and when it comes to doing your bikini line, its best to use a hard wax. Hope you have a better experience in the future! And please check out my blog :) http://alysha-365daysoftheunknown.blogspot.com/2011/10/its-just-number.html

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  21. I had scrolled all the way down and saw this category. I don't know what it is about waxing, but I thought it was a good idea to try the bikini area too even though my legs weren't a smooth process. That area was burned from the hot wax and having my area waxed raw too. >_<

    Now I only epilate the bikini area. I'll still wax my legs, but never the bikini area.

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  22. Haha, sorry if I laugh but this story was pretty fun :P You should try wax-strips instead, and they have wipes that take of the wax. And he best thing to take wax away is oil ;) Don't sure which oil works the best though.

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  23. LOL! Oh my god. I died at the SVU cameo comment.

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  24. you're such a good, funny writer! You should write some short stories
    thanks for sharing your experiences with us

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